Tri-County Man of the Year

Man of the Year motivated by faith

By Mike Ford, The Delphos Herald
Published:  Tuesday, January 2, 2007 (3 years, 2 months ago)
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DELPHOS — From one year to the next, the Tri-County Man of the Year is chosen for his community service.

Though this year’s recipient is no different, it’s his motivation that makes the strongest impact on those who know him.

Dave Stemen, 55, goes the extra mile to grant transportation assistance and more to the elder members of St. Peter Lutheran Church.

“They have a lot of pride and don’t always ask for help. There are a lot of widows and widowers; I tell them ‘you call me and I’ll give you a ride’,” he said.

Stemen provides them with transportation to church, to doctor’s offices and even helps them with things around the home, such as changing the clocks for Daylight Savings Time.

“Dave and his wife have picked me up for church a couple of times. He’s a very friendly man who does a lot for people,” said church member Pat Wreede.

Stemen has been involved with every aspect of congregational life at “St. Pete’s” since joining in 1984 after he and his wife, Connie, were married the previous year.

He is so well-loved in the church that he was elected to its council the first time he sought a seat.

“I told him ‘you’re in good with the little old ladies; you have it made’,” Connie said.

The current church council president has been Sunday School superintendent, served on the building committee, led youth meetings and is involved with men’s ministry.

“The men’s prayer breakfast has been my cornerstone,” he said.

Stemen points to his faith as the foundation of his life. His wife says that has made a significant difference.

Dave and Connie Stemen’s marriage is the second for both of them. Dave has two sons from his first marriage and Connie brought three sons into their blended family.

“I’ve been really fortunate to have him as a husband because he was accepting of my sons. He wanted to be more of a friend and not take over as their father,” she said. “I am proud of him getting so involved in the church. I used to be the spiritual head of the family but he took that role and that has made a tremendous difference. My son Rick has stuck with his faith because he saw Dave do it.”

The couple has also been foster-parents to several youth who stayed with them for short periods of time. However, one pair of sisters lived with them for more than a year and Stemen continues his relationship with them today. Faith lives in Lima, while Hope Stemen remains in Delphos. Sharing her former foster-parents’ last name is coincidental.

Hope Stemen found a haven in the couple’s home when she was in early adolescence, as did her sister.

“Dave and Connie took me in when I was 14 years old and they didn’t have to. They taught me how to drive and made my teenage years really great. They’ve been there for me ever since. Dave has a really big heart and has been someone I can call for any reason, whether something’s broke or I just need to talk,” she said.

Why Stemen wants to be a “rock” in the sisters’ lives is understandable in light of his background. He was in the eighth grade when his father died. He was a high school senior when his mother died. Then, he lost his brother.

“When my brother got killed in a car accident at 18 years of age, I started thinking life was too short to think much about the future, so I began to live for the moment. I started partying a lot and this was during my first marriage,” he explained. “I was only married 10 years, then I went through a divorce. Basically, when that hit me, I got a couple big bottles of beer and got in my car. I didn’t care if I committed suicide; I didn’t care if another car came down the road or if I hit a telephone pole. I wanted to give up on life. I remember being around Gomer on the side of the road and I just started crying like a baby. God touched me in some way; I was at the bottom of my bottom. I lost my mom; I lost my dad; then my brother. Now, I had lost a marriage and I was at the bottom. God touched me and gave me a perspective on humility. I realized that life wasn’t about me.”

It was approximately one month later that he met Connie.

“For a long time, I was just selfish. God touched my heart and I started focusing on others. Connie came into my life and she had three children; it just wasn’t about me anymore,” Stemen said.

The family-man’s involvement with youth extended to the local bowling alley.

“The other part of my life is the bowling alley. I’ve coached kids on Saturday mornings and I’m in the hall of fame out there. It’s all about encouraging the kids and having a good time,” he continued.

Stemen has hosted German exchange students and also plans to be involved with Habitat for Humanity as plans form to build two homes in Delphos.

“That project’s just getting started. Bob Ulm and Rev. Dave Howell asked me to be the lead volunteer. Resource Developer Kelly Hackworth and I have gone around town to businesses to get donations and there have been a couple of meetings but not much has happened yet. Habitat for Humanity is a fantastic organization that I’m glad to be involved with,” he said.

Stemen recently retired from the General Motors plant in Defiance after 35 years of employment. With his calendar wide open, he expressed an interest in the community project. Ulm said Stemen was chosen because he will have the time to commit to coordinating volunteers on so large an undertaking.

“I’ve known Dave for 30-some years and he’ll be great for the project,” Ulm said.

Another project Stemen wants to become involved with is rebuilding cities devastated by Hurricane Katrina. He and Connie recently drove to Louisiana but had to immediately leave due to a medical emergency. However, Stemen remains determined to make another trip.

“What I would like to do is get a bunch of guys together and go down. It’s something I really want to do,” he added.

As Stemen seeks to live out his faith in the life of his family and community, he counts himself as blessed by the various opportunities to give back.

“I’ve been blessed; I’ve been lucky. I’ve had a good job all my life and I just want to give back. What else is there to do in life?” he asks.

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